Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Can I Love You?

Ok, so mostly I just want to share a conversation that Jesus and I had last night. Here goes:

Me: Hey Jesus

Jesus: Hey you, how are you?

Me: I'm really happy

Jesus: And why are you happy?

Me: Because I got to write

Jesus: See, you really do need to write

Me: It definitely helps

Jesus: (chuckling) Yep, it does, because you tend to over think things. You start a thought then change it, and change it, and change it again. All without ever finishing it. It helps if you have to put it into once concise thought.

Me: Yeah, looks like you're right again Jesus

Jesus: Of course I am, you goose

(Both laughing)

After a pause...

Jesus: Can I love you?

Me: Um yeah. Of course you can Jesus

Jesus: Can I show you how I love you?

Me: Yes


Right after I said yes, my heart began to swell with emotions so intense, I've never felt that way before. Never. I wanted to cry, to laugh, to sing, to scream, all at the same time but with such an all-consuming desire to let every single thing I felt inside me out. In any possible way, no matter how extreme. My heart was breaking inside me, yet at the same time, bursting with joy. I didn't know what to do. I was immobilized by this one simple, yet incredibly profound feeling- Love.

I really can't describe how it made me feel. It's something you have to experience for yourself. No words seems strong enough to convey the depth of that emotion. It was most agonizing yet intensely delightful feeling I've ever experienced.

And it stays with you.
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4 comments:

  1. GraceonMeJuly 28, 2009 at 11:47 AM

    Thanks for sharing, putting into words what some of us feel at times but do not feel we have the words to share. You my dear have a very rare gift at such a time as this, to express to your generation the things of God, in a way that makes sense. Keep writing what He gives you we all need to hear it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Cheri'July 28, 2009 at 4:05 PM

    Yes, Julia, you need to keep writing these kinds of experiences!

    I have experienced this kind of love, but never dared try to wrap words around it. You succeeded! We need "your voice".

    Thanks for sharing! I love you, sweet niece!

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  3. LauraJuly 29, 2009 at 12:40 PM

    This is cool! I didn't know you wrote! you should start a book!
    Laura Ones

    ReplyDelete
  4. Julia KristineJuly 29, 2009 at 11:45 PM

    Aw thanks! Yeah, I love to write =)
    lol, Maybe I will someday!

    ReplyDelete

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